April 22, 2012
I need so much your advise in my situation because it lasts for almoust a year and I still can't understand if chinese guy is interested in me as a girlfriend, or it's a kind of friendship or just simle good attitude towards me.
I live in Russia and he is my teacher of wushu )). He is from central part of China and has been living in Russia for several years. I came to wushu school and met him in summer, last year. I am 25, he is 26.
In summer there were few people in our school, and other Chinese teachers were in China, so after my classes he started to offer me to stay and drink some tee with him. During this stays we talked a lot about wushu, China, their culture. I was very interested, asked him lots of questins and he willingly answered me, showed his videos of practise. Now the school is full of students learning wushu and we usually don't sit together and chatter, but sometimes it still happens, when there are not many people.
He is always wery kind to me, attentive (but he himself is very kind person, kind not only to me, but sometimes maybe a little more attentive to me). If a have bad mood he always sees that and asks what's wrong. He likes to ask me how am I, is everything ok, did I eat good or sleep well. Our relationship became not as teacher-student but just friendly, we are now on one level. I got interested in him and decided to shaw him very little that I like him and tried to be attentive to him. But never showed anything directly or doubtless.
Several times we went together from the school to the undergraund station, once it happened on his initiative, than the other times – on mine (I waited for him). We chattered all the time during walk. But now we don't go together, now he lives with other teacher and he takes my friend by car to the place they live.
I offered him help with language (his language is not good, sometimes it's not easy for him to communicate) and he accepted it very enthusiasticly. He asks me sometimes the meanings of Russian words, once asked to check text about wushu in Russian he wrote (just several pages). He likes to ask for my help (but not too much). He always looks at me when he says something to the group so as to see my reaction if he is doing well). He looks for my help to understand what are saying the others in Russian (I try to say this to him in easier manner). He once asked me to buy him a disk with Russian film, for learning purposes.
For the holidays he started to give me little presents! Twice he didn't take money from me for wushu lessons. But once he had to finsh classes a little earlier, maybe that was the reason he didn't take money. The other time he just asked for my help, and that was his price as I understood -free class. The help was that he asked me to look after the school, becuase he had to leave early, so he asked to look after other students, and after they would go – to close the school (he gave me the keys!!! only for that day of cource).
He once told me about himself, his character a little, his family, his views on life. But almost didn't asked the same about me. Once he told me that I am a good girl, kind.))
I invited him twice to go somewhere, show him the city (he recently came to my city). But he sais he doesn't have time. I know that he doesn' have it, its true, no time at all, but maybe he could find once if he wanted?
In February I asked him if he has a girlfriend and he said he did until recent (Chinese girl), but they broke, because he has no time for her. That is what he said to me.
So the question – does he like me? Is he interested in relationship with me?? It's near a year since we first met and I still can't understand him! He distinguishes me from others. He dosn't give the others presents, as far as I know, or treat them like me. But I am not bad student, practise a lot and he sees that, and I help him. So this can be just friendly attitude. But presents, from teacher??
But if he likes me, why doesn't he make more, show more clearly???
He has my number, but doesn't write or call unless it is connected with classes.
Has mail, but dosn't write.
I know that language can be a barrier for him but we can communicate.
He is not reach but not poor and I have good paid and prectigious work, maybe it can be a barrier for him too?
So the other question is if he likes me but thinks there are barriers to our relationship, does his behavior mean he won't go further because thinks it is impossible (he makes no clear steps)? Or he thinks that he will be able to overcome this barriers and we still have chances to develop something (because he continiues to be attentive to me)and he just wants me to wait a litle?
Thank you in advance for your advice! Sorry for long story, but I wanted to be clear, relationship of teacher and student can never be easy….
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