Meditation is a good practice of concentration

In the previous part of this series I presented the first four premises for the art of loving (as described by Erich Fromm): discipline, concentration, patience and supreme concern.

It’s worth to remind that if someone wants to achieve the mastership in ANY kind of human activity (like singing, growing flowers, teaching kids and so on), he has to make discipline, concentration and patience part of his life.

Fromm gives some suggestions regarding the ways in which one can practice these skills. I know that it sounds banal but can everyone of us claim that he/she follows such simple rules as “get up at a regular hour, devote a regular amount of time during the day to activities such as meditating, reading, listening to music, walking… not overeat or overdrink…”?

It is one of the unfortunate aspects of our Western concept of discipline (as of every virtue) that its practice is supposed to be somewhat painful and only if it is painful can it be good. The East has recognized long ago that which is good for man – for his body and for his soul – must also be agreeable, even though at the beginning some resistances must be overcome.

The practice of concentration is an even harder challenge. It’s about doing one thing at a time while paying maximum attention to the action itself without letting your mind to wander away. But before learning to do ONE thing at a time, it’s important to know how to do NOTHING at all. The best way to clean your mind from all distractions is to learn and practice some meditative techniques. Those who tried to meditate know how difficult it is to preserve the clean state of mind.

He will begin to feel restless, fidgety, or even to sense considerable anxiety. He will be prone to rationalize his unwillingness to go on with this practice by thinking that it has no value, is just silly, that it takes too much time, and so on, and so on. He will also observe that all sorts of thoughts come to his mind which take possession of him. He will find himself thinking about his plans for later in the day, or about some difficulty in a job he has to do, or where to go in the evening, or about any number of things that will fill his mind – rather than permitting it to empty itself.

One friend of mine suffers from a strange medical condition. She described it as a highly unpleasant sensation in her legs whenever she lies in bed and tries to fall asleep. After few minutes of lying still, she starts feeling incredible desire to move her toes, and – when it does not help – she pinches the skin on her feet, massages the toes or even gets up and walks. In Wikipedia I found that this condition is called “restless legs syndrome”.

For me this is a good analogy of what is happening with our mind whenever we stay alone. And while the restless legs syndrome affects less than 10% of western population**, the restless mind syndrome is a much more widespread condition.

** – Curiously, Wikipedia states that restless legs syndrome affects an estimated 7% to 10% of the general population in North America and Europe… and occurs in 1-5% of those from the Far East. Who knows, maybe instead of current treatment which includes iron supplements and opioids some patients would benefit from practicing yoga and meditation?

Only when person has mastered the skill of being alone and freeing his mind without getting anxious, he is ready to interact with other people in a meaningful way. It reminds me of the well-known statement that one cannot truly love someone else before he/she learned to love himself/herself… Meaningful interaction, however, is not measured by the significance of the topic itself .The way in which people share the information is more important than the topic itself:

To learn concentration requires avoiding, as far as possible, trivial conversation, that is, conversation which is not genuine. If two people talk about the growth of a tree they both know, or about the taste of bread they have just eaten together, or about a common experience in their job, such conversation can be relevant, provided they experience what they are talking about, and do not deal with it in an abstractified way; on the other hand, a conversation can deal with matters of politics or religion and yet be trivial; this happens when the two people talk in clichés. When their hearts are not in what they are saying.

Tasting wine

Just few months ago I was introduced to wine tasting. My friend LaVerna took me to a small winery in the Sharon Plain and there we tasted few sorts of local wine. I am sure that, unlike me, most westerners know HOW to drink wine but for me it was a new experience. I was charmed by the whole set of actions that must be undertaken in order to feel and truly enjoy the wine’s taste: opening the bottle, letting wine to “breath” for a while, looking at the wine, rotating it in the glass to let the bouquet of smells and tastes to open up and so on and so on. Just like tea ceremony in China, this is a wonderful example of simple activity that can gain deeper meaning if done with a high degree of concentration and devotion.

Recently I read an interesting article which can bridge the gastronomic topic with the topic of love (or more exactly lovemaking). Its authors describe the experience of eating an orange in a way which can be tagged as “sensual eating” (similar to another concept of mindful eating). If you are not allergic to oranges or their smell (…yeah, I have one friend who feels sick just from the smell of citruses), go ahead and try it.

Take an orange and feel its weight in your hand, look at its form, notice the texture of its skin. After fully enjoying the outside appearance of the orange, slowly peel off its skin. Sense the sweet and a little bit sharp fragrance of the fruit filling the room… Slowly separate one segment of orange and put it in your mouth. Don’t hurry to bite it but explore it for a while feeling the softness of its flesh. Then make a little bite letting the juice fill your mouth… OK, you got the idea :-).

And hopefully you weren’t completely bored with reading my moralizations (since it seems that I will need the third post to conclude the series about “Art of Loving”).

Long time not practicing yoga, Crystal Tao