This is the first installment of “Ask Chinese Girls” series. Idea for these series was inspired by Kaiwen – the member of LoveLoveChina forum – who suggested me to check out the Formspring platform where users can create a page through which other people will ask and answer different questions.
In my case these will be the questions about Chinese girls. But rather than answer them by myself, I will forward them to different Chinese forums. The compilation of translated answers will be published here.
The first question was:
“Why do so many Chinese girls have trouble finding boyfriends even though there are more men than women in China?”
- Due to abnormally high male-to-female ratio at birth and higher infant mortality among females – China has a surplus of young men of marriageable age.
- In spite of this fact some Chinese girls do not succeed to find boyfriend (and eventually marry) and become “leftover” women.
And here are the answers of Chinese netizens (not only girls, but from context it’s quite easy to guess the gender).
Because nowadays, girls are neither very successful nor are they failure. And good guys (having good conditions) are looking for obedient girls first of all, even if they are not good-looking. [ from Crystal: accidentally, I know some background about the girl who gave this answer. She is very beautiful, made eyelid plastic surgery, but doesn’t have a boyfriend ]
Because Chinese men are not very successful!
Because Chinese women are all too strong.
The reality is that either guy is OK, but doesn’t have money, or he has money but not good-looking. It’s too rare to find a guy who has both appearance and money. So, it’s difficult.
Nowadays, there are too many playboys.
Very simple! Their high requirements only allow men to look at them.
If females are not picky, they definitely can find spouses. But who would want to marry a beggar? There are more male beggars in the street than females. Now, it’s normal that a girl with good education wants to find a guy who is a little bit better (than her). For example, a female with PhD wants to find a male with PhD. However, men always look for those girls who are beautiful and have a so-so education / qualification.
Moreover, girls who have good income and education always fail (to find an ideal partner), so they are left [become “leftovers”].
Requirements are very high.
Because of the current tendencies in the society. Now it’s popular to be like this – be together when happy, otherwise depart. Not a lot could get married. Some girls won’t give up, but some will hide themselves and wait for the persons they dreamed of.
I think that Chinese girls are capable and independent. So for successful women who put career first it’s more difficult to find suitable boyfriends or husbands. I also think that Chinese men are playboys. No matter whether they have money or not, they all have several girls which is the continuation of ancient Chinese custom of polygamy. Many people think that it’s normal for guys (to have few girls) because it means that they are successful and they are able to support them. But if women do the same, they are bad eggs. Most Chinese women are traditional and they don’t know that their husbands have extramarital affairs.
Some women, however, have seen men who have two or three women; they think that the marriage is not reliable. Those women who were hurt are afraid of meeting a heartless guy. So some women choose to be single.
It just proves that Chinese women are capable. Without relying on men, why shouldn’t they rely on themselves?
Rely on yourself and life can be better!
It’s easy to get thousands pieces of gold, but difficult to find a loving boyfriend.
Girls live in fantasies.
In China, how many guys can own car, house, money and also have a good appearance? Good man is often poor, so (girl) is afraid. And if education is not good, nobody wants. I am myself a single guy. Men only will cherish those women who accompany them to get through the hard times together.
Women, please don’t be too naive!
Men are so unreliable. Women should be very careful.
If you also want to ask Chinese girls a question – submit it by following this link.
One of many Chinese girls, Crystal Tao