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Chinese Girls : Confusing Behavior, Western Born Chinese appeal, & Caucasians sexual attractiveness

Just ask us, we'll answer!

Just ask us, we'll answer!


We get alot of questions about Chinese girls on our Formspring page. A new HK based Chinese girls & relationship expert SC tries to answer some of your recent questions.

Q: After a short relationship years ago my girl suddenly chose that we should only be   friends . We stayed in touch and she recently called me. We hung out everyday for about a week then she told me she is seeing someone.I thought we were getting back together. I love her a lot. What happened?

A: That could be confusing in any situation, especially in a cross-cultural context. My take on this is that if girl is seeing someone then she would probably not hang out with you every day for a week. Perhaps she was trying to see how serious you are about her and test your reaction. Perhaps she is torn between wanting to keep you as a friend and your expectations that you two should be romantically involved. Generally, Chinese girls would appreciate a guy who expresses his feelings clearly by saying something like “I love you” “I want to be with you” aloud even if they’re currently in a relationship so that they have less risk when they chose to break off that relationship. So, my suggestion is to better express your feelings towards her but with the realization that this may involve rejection, atleast in the short term.


Q: Hi there, Im a New Zealand born Chinese who goes back to China yearly. I can speak and understand mandarin but i cant read or write mandarin. I often get told im “shuai” and i have this thing for cute asian girls. How can i get with some of them? Thanks

A: In general, it is two sides of the same coin for you to “get” those Chinese girl.

First, you’re probably attractive to them because of your Western education. You are perceived as more gentleman than most typical Chinese (don’t abuse that!), and you live in the New Zealand so you potentially  able to offer girls a different life out of their home place in China.

On the other hand, you don’t have the same culture background as they do, which makes it difficult to communicate and find common grounds . I don’t believe it is important how well you read or write Chinese  because you can always communicate with her in speaking/ listening, and that’s far more important.

I believe just like most girls, the only thing you can do is to find one that you like, and express your feeling to her.


Q: Do Chinese girls find Caucasian guys more sexually interesting than Asian guys and are they concerned that making love may be uncomfortable due to Caucasian guys usually having larger “manhood”

A:  I believe they find Caucasian more sexually interesting not because of larger manhood but because of their more attractive outlook (e.g. taller, look more handsome, more open). I don’t believe the Chinese girls care about manhood’s size as much.



Got something to say? Leave a comment below. Got more questions for us? Keep’em coming!

  • Danielduffy

    I have a friend and she is from China. We been good friends for about three years and have educated myself about her. I find your article here, is 100% accurate! I agree on all your answers.

  • Jeff

    How arrogant is that last question! He states white men having a “larger manhood” as fact, when we all know that is far from the case… the average size of a white cock (the last survey in Britain anyway) is 5 and half inches.

    • China Shark Mike

      What part of Britain do you live in? Last time I check true statistcal records for white men from Johnson and Johnson the average was 6 inches, sorry pal guess that puts you in the peewee league. 5 inches might be the standard for Chinese men, believe me I’ve asked a lot of women and that seems to be the actual number I got. My study however only cover about a dozen, maybe a few more in 3 yrs.

      • Jeff

        Johnson and Johnson? Link to the research then.

        And where’s the part that mentioned my length? And once again, it is laughable that YOU said that SOME GIRLS SAY that Chinese men have small. First off, unless they’ve shagged the entire world’s men and accurately measured them, it’s anecdotal data, hearsay. Secondly, what sort of a paranoid man asks about sizes when talking to women? Either you’re lying (white man on a Chinese blog that badmouths oriental males, not surprising), or you must keep rather weird company.

      • Jeff

        “A lot” – “about a dozen”.

        Rightio. Keep on perpetuating that myth pal. Because unless you’ve seen all Chinese (and all other races) – and measured them – anything you or people say is based on rumour, stereotyping or even worse, “someone else says”. Which is simply childish.

      • icarusty

        No, I won’t believe you. You can make anything up here, draw studies out of your arse.

        Also – you ask women of other men’s penis size. Very insecure and weird. Any sane women would run the fuck away from you. Not forgetting that if this did actually happen – say to a girlfriend (or prostitute, the way you’re going on about things) – OF COURSE she’s gonna say you’re the “biggest and best”. And moan moan moan, so loud like she’s never done before for any man.

        And your own little study – you look at other men’s cocks to compare.

  • China Shark Mike

    I’m going to comment before I read the other posters to try to be objective and not influenced by what I iniatelly read. Perceptions of what is handsome or beauty is in the eye of the beholder. A Chinese Hong Kong fellow expatriot told me flat most Chinese men are not remotely handsome in any sense of the word and he has a very Chinese looking face, and yes he included himself in the statement. Also, keep in mind the different races view the other as exotic and intriguing the other as more appealing to the eye. Chinese woman I know are attracted to our light hair and eyes, our higher bridge noses, our sense of gentlemenliness. It’s the whole package so to speak.  Being Chinese looking sometimes is a turnoff if you meet a girl who is into something different. Also, Chinese me have really bad reputations of treating women bad here,, strike two and last but not least most Chinese will never own a house or a car thay they bought hence, lose lose for the decent Chinese man.

    • Jeff

      Indeed, but that obviously works the other way. Blacks hardly have “high bridge noses”, have darker hair and eyes (as with asians)… and they are extremely attractive to white women in white countries.

      • Rastus

         I am a big black guy and I am extremely attracted to chiness men and boys.   Wouldeti you like to meet me for sex sometime?  I  travel to HK often on business. 

        • icarusty

          I hope the Chinese authorities read this, if you are attracted to boys then you need locking up. Paedos get disembowelled where I’m from.

      • Joseph Trenton

        The only White women who are attracted to negro males are goldiggers who marry negro athletes and performers for their money. The other White women who are attracted to negro males are usually women with extremely low self esteem or drug problems that would be attracted to criminal types and “bad boys” anyway. These are the lowest of the low of White women and no quality White guys would be interested in them anyway.

        • icarusty

          Hahaha that says it all about you, really. When you support interracial relationships re: white women, but resort to the very racism that you complain about when it comes to other races men and white women… and there are plenty of attractive white women who are pretty high in independence/self confidence who have bagged equally decent (as in, not criminal) black men. But yeah, they’re all gangstas, just like asian men have small cocks who beat up their wives….. much like all white men are paedos.

          Also to add, you say white women dating outside their race are insecure – as if white men are that fabled ideal every woman looks up to – do you realise the irony of this? If anything, it is the asian women who date white men who are the most insecure of themselves… read the reasons why they only date white men – they like white male features, they don’t like their own asian ones, they want to wipe out their own – is that the sign of a confident woman??? A self hating one???

        • icarusty

          Ahaha, so quick is that veneer of civility to drop. As soon as you hear of white (“your”) women and other races men, you display that level of hostility and racism that you accuse others of when there are white men-other races’ women….

          There are plenty of black, asian and arab men with white women who are not drug dealers or criminals of the sort. At the same time, their white wives are attractive, not lacking confidence (indeed, some seeked out nonwhites because they were fed up of white men being arseholes).

    • icarusty

      Also, Chinese me have really bad reputations of treating women bad here,, strike two

      “Chinese men have bad reputations”…. yes, and who stands to gain the most from such bad reputations? Thus who would spread that reputation (amongst other negative stereotypes) so that they would get something from it? Why yes indeed, white men.